I know, I've been MIA for me...

Here's what's been going on the last three days since my fill...I've been crazy busy and crazy stressed, so I've been taking notes, but not blogging - I don't go there at work AT all. I hope it makes sense...it was written at various times, so there were gonnas followed by dids, if that makes sense...just came back from a double feature with Eric - Alice in Wonderland and Repo Men - that was an interesting movie - lots to think about, especially in a) the health care issues in the news today and b) my good friend's dad passed away Wednesday from pancreatic cancer. They would've done anything to extend his life, as long as they could also preserve his quality of life...a mechanical pancreas might have done the trick...

Wednesday morning -a .5 cc fill.

haven't really felt much restriction.

I had water, a small chocolate milk, two cups of chicken soup, one fork of buckwheat groats, large cup of tea with half and half, and a biscotti dipped in tea - I know, not liquid, but I was really really hungry and it was total mush


this am, Thursday, one xanax to deal with work stress ;), large tea with milk and splenda,chocolate muscle milk with a packet of benefiber, one cheese stick, chewed carefully (felt a little restriction, but barely any) and will have an isopure, alpine punch - 40 g protein. - didn't happen

I am going to a benefit tonight to network. It is a Chinese banquet...shitski! I will try to have some soup...maybe a few bites of something if it is soft...

I had one glass of wine, one small spring roll with plum sauce, two tiny wontons, a few snow peas and little shreds of chicken, one shrimp, two pieces broccoli, a few candied walnuts, a few nibbles of mushroom, one baby corn, three bites of beef, maybe three tiny bites of lo mein noodles, a fortune cookie, one huge grape and three chunks of melon. It all went down super easy, except the shrimp was a little sticky. I think it was a little overcooked. But no stucky, everything was fine.

I totally violated my dr's advice of 2 days liquids, two days mushies. The total amount I ate was quite small, and I was totally satisfied.

I was at a table, everyone was enthusiastically passing food around, and it was so yummy looking and would have been somehow dis-courteous to pass it all up...and once it was on my plate I couldn't help nibble at it. I'm not unhappy with what I ate, just that I did eat it despite my dr's orders...I've been consoling myself with the fact that other people only have to do one day of liquid and one day of mushies, which I was at the end of.
Or some people don't have any rules at all...

I weighed in at an all time low this am, 241.5 lbs, but I was so disappointed with myself for not following the rules and potentially hurting my band that I am barely excited. Also, to be a hundred percent honest, I remembered after my last fill, I strictly stuck to the 2 days liquids and 2 days mushies, and I lost 9 lbs! I was kinda hoping for such amazing results...My birthday is at the end of the month, and I was kind of hoping to be 50 lbs down by then. It's a reach, it's only three months and a week past surgery, but I am almost 39 lbs down already...and I can taste it!

then half a cup of rasp. sorbet later that night.

This am, Friday, two cheesesticks, a glazed donut and hot tea with milk.
1 little garlic bagel chips, cottage cheese single with strawberry.

bento box for lunch - ate it for lunch and dinner. Miso soup, 2 shrimp dumplings, piece of carrot, about 2-3 ounces of beef, a few bites of rice, and most of a spicey tuna roll.

pineapple slices and a few pieces of fresh coconut.

1/3 of a medium popcorn with a lil' butter and a few sips of diet coke over ice.